Teri Hatcher in primitive light gun game escapade!

Who’d have thunk it? After my numerous fruitless hours grafting my way through a myriad of false leads via Google, I finally have unearthed photo evidence of Teri Hatcher gaming.

In a way.

Teri1

Well, it is a game. It would seem that some type of projectile could be emitted from the front end of the gun. But I like to imagine that the contraption is some kind of unreleased Afterburner universe (seems to have a plane type wheel) light gun coin-op constructed by Sega and play tested by Hatcher as a precursor to green lighting the first Virtua Cop.

Teri2

Another picture of her toying with a gizmo from Sega’s secret Area 51 style R&D department where they’re already up to Dreamcast 9 and Megadrive 15. Wait… is that a prototype Sega Bass Fishing rod?

Apparently the girl next to her is her daughter. Shame Teri couldn’t pass her genes directly on to her offspring without diluting them with those of some unkempt ruffian of a former husband thus basically resulting in an identical but younger clone. The Empire had the technology, but we had Teri in our galaxy far, far away. Sometimes things just aren’t meant to be. Sigh…

Teri3

Of more pressing concern, is the man directly behind her making no secret of checking out her wares from the first picture. Not even feigning looking at his phone while hovering over the target is such a rookie mistake. So I hear. The guy obviously has no clue. Probably doesn’t even have a tattoo of her phone number yet either. Amateur.

According to my sources, a.k.a the captions under the pictures I saw, these shots are taken from some kind of Disney Planes movie launch party. Teri provided the voice of Dottie, who apparently isn’t worthy of either being a plane, nor featuring in the videogame. Bet it sucks anyway. Honestly, who’s in charge of this stuff?

Dottie

This is Dottie. They get Teri on board, and this is what they come up with? Grigging A…

Well, that’s enough for today. I’m off to watch season 2 of the New Adventures of Superman and pretend it’s still ’94 when I had some semblance of misplaced hope for the world…

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