Groon Lake, Nevada

‘Twas the night before Christmas (or in fact, the Captivate embargo being lifted), when all through the house, not a shread of hope remained, it was as dead as a door mouse.

Welcome jovial fellow one and all, as we find ourselves teetering on the brink of a Street Fighting event of unparalleled magnitude! By this time tomorrow, the veil of secrecy will have been lifted and we will have been officially made aware of what the grig is going on. Now this is something that could go one of two ways – at best, I anticipate being disappointed. At worst, I expect to be disappointed and wronged in a way that even Sam Beckett wouldn’t be able to put right even if he had unlimited cracks of the Leaping whip. And thus, we stand staring confirmation in the eye – are Capcom the reason ol’ Sam never made it home (or was he just feeling like a person in Rome? Hee hee, I joke!)? Quite what such a crushing revelation could be I couldn’t even hazard a guess – maybe a patch to take characters out of the current SSF4 perhaps? A graphics tinker in homage to Block Tennis where the current polygonal characters are replaced with square sprites? Or maybe even an alleged enhancement where every character becomes a shoto in a nod to the rehashed likes of Oni and Evil Ryu because apparently, there aren’t enough of them in it already? But if there’s one thing modern gaming has taught me – if there’s one generation that can crush a mans spirit, it’s this one!

So, before we find out anything for sure, we follow up the last weeks article and have a brief look at the leaks and clues that have cropped up since.

Leaked trailer: Obviously the most significant thing that has happened, pretty much confirming… well, everything really. The trailer hit the net on April 7th and had the elite Capcops (as they’ve been not-so-affectionately named) chasing posters left right and centre, pulling the video from any place they found it and slapping copyright violation notices up in their place. Of course, there was not much they could do, and lets face it – we all saw it. And boy, did it take the wind out of my sails! It was all the evidence had been pointing to – DLC featuring the 4 lame as grig AE characters that I was fearing. Arcade Edition and Arcade Edition only, seems to be what we’re getting. Ooh, but we’re getting an enhanced replay channel mode so you can follow all the top players, I hear you cry. How exciting – if I wanted to watch Daigo or Tokido, I’d watch them on YouTube! This is not where I was hoping that they were going to concentrate their efforts! Sigh…

Leaked Achievments Looking Legit: The Achievement list from last year has been given even more credibility, detailing achievements via the ability to follow players, now exposed in the coming replay channel additions. It’s looking like the list that many had criticised and now forgotten about, has been genuine all along.

PC SSFIV Listing: While Capcom have spent the last year standing firm over their refusal to release SSFIV on the PC, it looks finally like fan demand, and allegedly sense has prevailed. Ono has been hinting at the versions existence for a while, and even suggesting it will be one of the big Captivate revelations. Of course again, we will know for sure soon. However, could Capcoms DLC nightmare be stamped all over it already? Indeed, if an ESRB listing is anything to go by! The listing details many features of the game, from the ‘Alcohol Reference’ in the distillery, to more amusingly, the girl cast members, describing them as sporting outfits that are ‘form-fitting and accentuate their breasts and buttocks; the camera occasionally zooms-out from close-up views of flexed gluteus’. Get out of here with that kind of erotic talk you animal! Of course, at the top of the page, it has the standard info; age rating, platform, SSFIV as the the name… wait a second. Just wait a jimmying second! Super Street Fighter iv? SUPER STREET FIGHTER IV?!!! Yes that’s right. This, like the recent 3DS version, is apparently not the Arcade Edition. I can smell the foul stench of rip-off DLC as I stand down wind of the dump of a future Capcom are carving out.

Well, that’s the bulk of the interest. Once again, I cling to hope – Ono answering a recent Tweet after a guy told him something along the lines of ‘We already know about AE DLC (speaking about the trailer leak)’ to which he again just urged us to wait for the 12th and the proper announcement. All I can realistically hope for at this point are new characters via separate, probably individual DLC. And to bring me to the point where I actually hope they have DLC up their sleeves, that I have to ackowledge as quite an achievement. So to some extent, well played Capcom. But if you don’t come good tomorrow, there’s gonna be trouble! And no amount of Third Strike Online Edition or SFXTekken is gonna save ya!

Probably. They might be really good.

But one thing is for sure: Capcom – Sam Becketts fate is in your hands. Don’t grig it up!

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1 Response to Groon Lake, Nevada

  1. bedgell says:

    Hehehheh good assessment – and loving those quantum leap lyrics. what absolute legend was behind that classic bit of writing?!

    I been looking at Capcom Japan’s site and checking out all the artwork – the tragedy is that it’s such an awesome game that I so desperately WANT to get excited about it. But how can ya when they look like they’re so definitely gonna let us all down?

    That said, nice chef costume for yun. I’d pay 200msp for this dlc. Wait? Whaaaaat?! It’s gonna be more like 1500?! Why you sonofa…

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